basically...Obama seen me naked

Ok, so, this post is all about my appointment at the doctor this morning. It was supposed to be one of those regular dr appointments...routine physical. 20 minutes tops and im good...fuck was i wrong.



So, i get there, right on time. 10 minutes early even. Got called back right away. Wow, i thought it was gunna b GREAT. Nurse was mega nice. CC was fussy cuz it was her naptime but i mean, whats a mom to do when dad works? Get on the scale, and there it is...the same number that was there when i was 9 freaking months PREGNANT! ugh, theres the beginning of the crapola to come. BP 134/80. not bad. could the weight b all?



I told the nurse that i'd also like to get some blood work done. Test thyroids, for diabetes, etc. just to make sure nothing is prohibiting the ass kicking im about to give myself to lose this fat suit. She tells me that the med group does paps now so i dont even have to make an appointment to go to Women's Health. It's at this moment im glad i took that shower right before i left to go to the dr. jic of course. She shows me a rob and a blanket, both made of paper, and tells me to put the rob on, open to the front and then cover myself with the other sheet of paper. awesome. She leaves a note for dr in system and says dr will b here soon.

I stripped down naked, and as soon as i looked up...theres Obama's face on the cover of a magazine...so basically, Obama has seen me naked. and this was just the beginning of the shittiness...



This lady walks in and shes tiny...theres nothing a fat person hates more than talking to a skinny ass person ABOUT being fat. ugh. So I asked her if our insurance would pay for me to see a nutritionist. She says sure, and that theres one on base so I dont even have to go far! sweet! she checked arms, legs, etc. all the usual. she seen my neck, which always looks dirty but i swear its like a birthmark or something cuz it doesnt wash off, and says, have you ever heard of (insert medical word that sounds insane and spelt even differently but basically means you neck looks dirty) i said no right, cuz i dont even know what language that was you were speaking just now...she says well its a sign of diabetes, you really should lose some weight and check it. NO SHIT LADY I JUST ASKED FOR THAT WHEN I WALKED IN THIS DAMN ROOM!!! As she proceeds to lay me down to do the breast exam i had no idea was coming, cc had had enough of this shit. she started screaming. dr says i can get a nurse to help if u want. i was like sure, sounds like a plan. what she left out was that she was taking my daughter away, out of the room, so that a nurse could basically, babysit her? now remember pl, i am laying here, im a paper gown, under a sheet of freaking paper - was i supposed to run out into the hall, butt ass naked and tell the crazy lady i didnt want my child to run away. she came back and said cc was laughing and stuff, so i decided it was ok since this is only gunna b another 5 mins right?

she proceeds to the other breast and asks if i breastfeed cc. awesome. i said of course, no sry dried up. wanted to though. she looked at me with disappoint. she couldnt have been more disappointed in me, than i already was. then she says last but not least, we'll finish up with the pap. as if its like the cherry on top.

it took this woman 20 minutes to decide she just couldnt find my cervix. then she says, "well see, with all your fluff (as if i am 5 years old and cant accept or comprehend the word fat) sometimes it can flatten your cervix. im going to have to go to women's health and get some1 from over there to come and help." as she walks out of the room, my embarassment level goes from 10 - 12345687643. they both come back, next lady takes 4.5 seconds to find and swab the cervix. damn, that was hard eh? she leaves after commenting on how beautiful my daughter is. the daughter thats not in the room, which means cc must have been making rounds out there with who knows?

anyways, she goes over to her computer, and heres the part that REALLY put the cherry on top... she says, "well i put the referral in and id like you to stop by there today and try to make the appointment. Now, a normal person can go every other week, but you should go at least once a week so that you can be accountable for your actions" all while she's looking at me with discust in her eyes like i was the scum of the earth.

Let me clearify one thing ok? I DO NOT EAT 4 LARGE PIZZAS FOR DINNER WITH A SIDE OF 2 GALLONS OF ICE CREAM AND CHERRYS ON TOP. Half the time i forget to eat breakfast AND lunch...so there stupid skinny ass doctor who has never once in your life worried about your weight or how people look at you - because IF YOU EVER EVEN ONCE DID, you would have NEVER EVER LOOKED AT ME LIKE THAT!!!!

ugh, people who feel this way when they leave a doctors office usually hear that they have some sort of disease...me? im just fat...and this lady decided it needed to b thrown in my face. ugh...screw this day

pooooooooooooooooo