My Neice, Maddi

Since I am staying with my sister to try and pay off debt, I have also been watching her daughter, Maddi, during the day. Now at first, Cadence & Maddi didnt like it other much. There were a lot of jealous crys, stealing of toys, even a little bit of bullying.

Now, theres still jealous crys, stealing of toys, even a little bit of bullying - but not AS much. For the most part they play together nicely, or apart nicely.

Maddi has the longest NATURAL eyelashes you will EVER see! It's the first thing anyone notices about her. They are BEAUTIFUL! As far as hair goes, we are still working on that one. She kinda looks like Jason Alexander - nothing on top, just some around the back & ears. lol One day she will have long, curly hair. Yes, definitely curly.

She is currently 10 months old. I'll be here until she's around 13 months old. I'm sure gunna miss her! It has been sooo nice to be close to family right now. I don't get to see my neice Alayna much and that makes me super sad but its just part of the military life!

Anyways, I just wanted to say how much I love this little girl & cant wait to watch her grow - even if that means catching her & Cadence trying to sneak out as teenagers, or mad because they like the same boy. Whatever - its worth it!

We love you Maddi Mooski!

Our lives, as of now

So much has happened since I last posted - I'm not even sure where to start.

My husband is currently deployed in Iraq. He volunteered a while back to try and get us out of debt. Cadence and I are living in Louisiana right now with my lovely sister while he is gone to have that extra rent money to put towards debt. So far 3 things down, 3 to go.

Cadence is 14 months now. She is walking and talking and getting into EVERYTHING! She is indeed the love of our lives!!! She did her very first pageant this past Saturday. Didn't place but she did GREAT! She blew kisses , waved, said hi, everything I could have hoped for! Definitely 1st place in my book!

I have been casually tackling weight loss. My casually I mean, thinking but not doing lol I need to get my butt in gear for sure. I did attempt some things, but all fell through in the end. I have a good friend who has put me in touch with someone who has been here, done that and lost a good bit of weight so my hopes is that she can help me! I need help people lol

Thats it for now - I hear crying through the baby monitor.

SUPERBOWL CHAMPS!!!

Ok, I suck at blogging lately. Between Christmas vacation, Marcus going to Iraq, & moving to Louisiana - I have basically totally dropped blogging for a while.

However, tonight is a special night and deserves to be posted.

SAINTS WON THE SUPERBOWL!!!! This is a shout out to the WHO DAT NATION!!!!! I had to make sure and mark this in history so that in 25 years, my kids can come back to my blog and see that i was in fact there watching the saints go into history!!!! This one is for you Cadence, and any youngin's to come!!!

WHO DAT BABY!!! GEAUX SAINTS!!!!

Happy First Birthday Princess!

Happy first birthday Cadence Danyelle. You are truly our miracle and we thank God for you everyday!!! Can't wait to see what the next year has in store for you!!! We love you so much!!!

Should there be more?

I am just sitting here today, while Cadence naps - and i got to thinking. You see all these people who are doing extraordinary things with their lives, and i began to ask myself. Should there be more?

My general day is pretty much the same. Get up with cc, feed her - play til she naps. Then i pick up the house while she's asleep. rinse repeat until Marcus gets home. Then I cook dinner while he plays with cc and we watch certain tv shows. CC goes down at 8. Thats when we move upstairs and generally watch tv until we fall asleep. boring much?

I want to do something extraordinary with my life. I want to be remembered for something good. So, what should i do? Work at food shelters? Volunteer for different things? Lets face it - we have one car, and its gone from 7 - 430 every day. not to mention, I have to watch my daughter during that time.

So, how do i do it? how do i reach out and help the community in some way? Totally selfless. I have no problem with helping other people to the farthest that i can reach and afford - i just dont know what to do!

I do know that I want to do SOMETHING. Even if I can do it from home. I've even considering starting my own non-profit to help somehow. I want to do something to help this Earth - to help this World - but i'll start off with just this community for now.

Wish me luck and any ideas are welcome!!!

Turning over a new leaf

So, one thing I have come to realize lately is that you can't decide the people who walk into your life. You can't control at ALL...but what you can control - is who you let stay. Who you left effect you, who you let change you - for the better or the worst.

Today i am letting go of people who don't need to stay. Who should have NEVER been as big of a part as they were.

There are few things that I TRULY can't stand. One of which is cheaters. Any situation of cheating is wrong - but whats worse is when you do it while your husband is fighting for our freedom. That was the FINAL straw for me.

I have recently been blessed with such amazing friends here. Drama free. All of our previous great amazing friends have moved on, away from Kirtland. We miss them sooo much! but we are blessed here.

The last thing I will tolerate is a personal attack on my character. Especially when that attack is on my christianity! How dare someone assume that they can even understand it when they dont believe in God? I will continue to pray for that family though. At the very least, for the kids involved.

So, as a closer on such a strange blog - NEVER let someone stay in your life who is toxic! It will either bring you down, or you will eventually have to walk away - or both.

basically...Obama seen me naked

Ok, so, this post is all about my appointment at the doctor this morning. It was supposed to be one of those regular dr appointments...routine physical. 20 minutes tops and im good...fuck was i wrong.



So, i get there, right on time. 10 minutes early even. Got called back right away. Wow, i thought it was gunna b GREAT. Nurse was mega nice. CC was fussy cuz it was her naptime but i mean, whats a mom to do when dad works? Get on the scale, and there it is...the same number that was there when i was 9 freaking months PREGNANT! ugh, theres the beginning of the crapola to come. BP 134/80. not bad. could the weight b all?



I told the nurse that i'd also like to get some blood work done. Test thyroids, for diabetes, etc. just to make sure nothing is prohibiting the ass kicking im about to give myself to lose this fat suit. She tells me that the med group does paps now so i dont even have to make an appointment to go to Women's Health. It's at this moment im glad i took that shower right before i left to go to the dr. jic of course. She shows me a rob and a blanket, both made of paper, and tells me to put the rob on, open to the front and then cover myself with the other sheet of paper. awesome. She leaves a note for dr in system and says dr will b here soon.

I stripped down naked, and as soon as i looked up...theres Obama's face on the cover of a magazine...so basically, Obama has seen me naked. and this was just the beginning of the shittiness...



This lady walks in and shes tiny...theres nothing a fat person hates more than talking to a skinny ass person ABOUT being fat. ugh. So I asked her if our insurance would pay for me to see a nutritionist. She says sure, and that theres one on base so I dont even have to go far! sweet! she checked arms, legs, etc. all the usual. she seen my neck, which always looks dirty but i swear its like a birthmark or something cuz it doesnt wash off, and says, have you ever heard of (insert medical word that sounds insane and spelt even differently but basically means you neck looks dirty) i said no right, cuz i dont even know what language that was you were speaking just now...she says well its a sign of diabetes, you really should lose some weight and check it. NO SHIT LADY I JUST ASKED FOR THAT WHEN I WALKED IN THIS DAMN ROOM!!! As she proceeds to lay me down to do the breast exam i had no idea was coming, cc had had enough of this shit. she started screaming. dr says i can get a nurse to help if u want. i was like sure, sounds like a plan. what she left out was that she was taking my daughter away, out of the room, so that a nurse could basically, babysit her? now remember pl, i am laying here, im a paper gown, under a sheet of freaking paper - was i supposed to run out into the hall, butt ass naked and tell the crazy lady i didnt want my child to run away. she came back and said cc was laughing and stuff, so i decided it was ok since this is only gunna b another 5 mins right?

she proceeds to the other breast and asks if i breastfeed cc. awesome. i said of course, no sry dried up. wanted to though. she looked at me with disappoint. she couldnt have been more disappointed in me, than i already was. then she says last but not least, we'll finish up with the pap. as if its like the cherry on top.

it took this woman 20 minutes to decide she just couldnt find my cervix. then she says, "well see, with all your fluff (as if i am 5 years old and cant accept or comprehend the word fat) sometimes it can flatten your cervix. im going to have to go to women's health and get some1 from over there to come and help." as she walks out of the room, my embarassment level goes from 10 - 12345687643. they both come back, next lady takes 4.5 seconds to find and swab the cervix. damn, that was hard eh? she leaves after commenting on how beautiful my daughter is. the daughter thats not in the room, which means cc must have been making rounds out there with who knows?

anyways, she goes over to her computer, and heres the part that REALLY put the cherry on top... she says, "well i put the referral in and id like you to stop by there today and try to make the appointment. Now, a normal person can go every other week, but you should go at least once a week so that you can be accountable for your actions" all while she's looking at me with discust in her eyes like i was the scum of the earth.

Let me clearify one thing ok? I DO NOT EAT 4 LARGE PIZZAS FOR DINNER WITH A SIDE OF 2 GALLONS OF ICE CREAM AND CHERRYS ON TOP. Half the time i forget to eat breakfast AND lunch...so there stupid skinny ass doctor who has never once in your life worried about your weight or how people look at you - because IF YOU EVER EVEN ONCE DID, you would have NEVER EVER LOOKED AT ME LIKE THAT!!!!

ugh, people who feel this way when they leave a doctors office usually hear that they have some sort of disease...me? im just fat...and this lady decided it needed to b thrown in my face. ugh...screw this day

pooooooooooooooooo