Called pedi as soon as I woke up. No appointments - of course. I am a first time mom, who just so happens to also have extreme anxiety and worry issues - and yet- u want to tell me that u wont see my daughter?! her first flu...her first runny nose...her first cough - and u wont see her? even to tell me that things will be ok?!
Nurse says humidifier, saline drops in the nose, suction out the snot - but no more than 4x a day. Tylenol or Motrin if theres a fever...thats it? No miracle drug to make this better? No, she'll be fine. No, I'll take it all away in five minutes and make this better?
Then of course, the question..."do you breastfeed?" each time i hear this, its like someone stabs my heart....did i try? OF COURSE...did i want to more than anything else? DUH could i? no...y? sure, it was probably partially me. I could have, should have done more research. Taken a class...something. I should have been more prepared. I should have known better - i should have done it. I should b nurturing my daughters tiny little body with the stuff God intended for her...but the answer is no. ok? everyone out there, the freaking answer is NO! No, i am a failure at what I should have been able to do by my God given right - NO - i cant give my child the antibodies that she needs to NOT get sick...no no no no no....
She did ok. She ate every meal. Not as much as usual, but who can blame her? Def a little more fussy, def not as easily pleased - but all in all, she's still smiling, still playing with her toys, still trying to become hannibal and eat those fingers...still my little girl right?
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